Friday, August 29, 2003
FINALLY, A WEBSITE FOR ME
Okay, well not just for me bout for you, too, dear readers. If you want to know how evil Bushco is, check this out, yo! It's the George W. Bush Scorecard of Evil. I like this one so much it's going to the permanent link row on your right...
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Okay, well not just for me bout for you, too, dear readers. If you want to know how evil Bushco is, check this out, yo! It's the George W. Bush Scorecard of Evil. I like this one so much it's going to the permanent link row on your right...
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What I did on my summer vacation
by George W. Bush (as told to MercuryX23)
I had a great summer. First I got to play golf at some of the finest golf courses I’ve ever been golfing to. Then Mom bought me a new Playstation 2 and after I played golf on the course I played it on the TV. I’m a much better TV golfer then I am a real golfer. Dad’s always yelling at me to turn my wrists so I don’t slice and I keep telling Karl to get that O’Reilly fellow to come out to the course to tell dad to Shut Up because if I say anything Dad just cuffs me on the ear and tells me to quit sassing him. I get so mad but then I just go back to Crawford which Dad hates saying it’s a dusty hell hole but I like it because I can make everyone else come here while I drive around in my truck and try to catch dust devils before going back to the Playstation and beating Tiger Woods on the TV or playing Baseball on the TV, which is just about my favorite thing to do over a few beers, I mean Root Beers. Karl said to call them Root Beers. Summer sure is great. I just wish I didn’t have to go back to Washington this fall. I have to get up early and Tom Delay’s always coming over and he smells like Raid.
(for more of Bushco's summer antics, check out the Corrente contest as well as other great content there)
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by George W. Bush (as told to MercuryX23)
I had a great summer. First I got to play golf at some of the finest golf courses I’ve ever been golfing to. Then Mom bought me a new Playstation 2 and after I played golf on the course I played it on the TV. I’m a much better TV golfer then I am a real golfer. Dad’s always yelling at me to turn my wrists so I don’t slice and I keep telling Karl to get that O’Reilly fellow to come out to the course to tell dad to Shut Up because if I say anything Dad just cuffs me on the ear and tells me to quit sassing him. I get so mad but then I just go back to Crawford which Dad hates saying it’s a dusty hell hole but I like it because I can make everyone else come here while I drive around in my truck and try to catch dust devils before going back to the Playstation and beating Tiger Woods on the TV or playing Baseball on the TV, which is just about my favorite thing to do over a few beers, I mean Root Beers. Karl said to call them Root Beers. Summer sure is great. I just wish I didn’t have to go back to Washington this fall. I have to get up early and Tom Delay’s always coming over and he smells like Raid.
(for more of Bushco's summer antics, check out the Corrente contest as well as other great content there)
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Thursday, August 28, 2003
HEY YOU! DON'T WATCH THAT! WATCH THIS!
It's really quite amusing watching the media try to cover for SwOrgynegger. I mean, seriously, if ANY other political candidate (well, maybe with the exception of Bushco) was caught with his pants down and joint proudly displayed, do you think for a second the media wouldn't just crucify him (or her)? There would be mad headlines and angry conservatives on the radio shouting out about the immorality and the anti-godness of this debaucher, this evil bodybuilder. Imagine of Swollenpecker was a Democrat!!! I mean, all sorts of nasty stuff is being thrown at Bustamente (some of it unfortunately true...c'mon Cruz, quit the militant organizations) but none of it compares to the serious lack of intellect and morality that accompanies the Sperminator. And yet he's suppose to clean things up... But you watch these conservative media types scrambling around trying to cover for him saying that "It was what people did in the 70's" (lots of people didn't screw every bodybuilding groupy that threw herself at them while doing steriods and smoking weed...lots of people didn't like...hmmm Gray Davis!) I've heard a few different excuses being made for this wreck of a candidate and all I keep thinking is maybe we have the right guy in office right now given the new, so-called better choices we're being offered. I finally have a little respect for Bill Simon. At least he knows that it's better to be a one time loser than to lose twice in the same period of a year and, even worse, to an immoral womanizing incomprehensible schmuck like Smokinpotter.
But, like I've been saying all along, don't bother with any of these job stealing ass clowns. Vote NO on the recall and tell them you won't have your vote uncounted
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It's really quite amusing watching the media try to cover for SwOrgynegger. I mean, seriously, if ANY other political candidate (well, maybe with the exception of Bushco) was caught with his pants down and joint proudly displayed, do you think for a second the media wouldn't just crucify him (or her)? There would be mad headlines and angry conservatives on the radio shouting out about the immorality and the anti-godness of this debaucher, this evil bodybuilder. Imagine of Swollenpecker was a Democrat!!! I mean, all sorts of nasty stuff is being thrown at Bustamente (some of it unfortunately true...c'mon Cruz, quit the militant organizations) but none of it compares to the serious lack of intellect and morality that accompanies the Sperminator. And yet he's suppose to clean things up... But you watch these conservative media types scrambling around trying to cover for him saying that "It was what people did in the 70's" (lots of people didn't screw every bodybuilding groupy that threw herself at them while doing steriods and smoking weed...lots of people didn't like...hmmm Gray Davis!) I've heard a few different excuses being made for this wreck of a candidate and all I keep thinking is maybe we have the right guy in office right now given the new, so-called better choices we're being offered. I finally have a little respect for Bill Simon. At least he knows that it's better to be a one time loser than to lose twice in the same period of a year and, even worse, to an immoral womanizing incomprehensible schmuck like Smokinpotter.
But, like I've been saying all along, don't bother with any of these job stealing ass clowns. Vote NO on the recall and tell them you won't have your vote uncounted
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Sunday, August 24, 2003
JUST BECAUSE THE RECALL IS REAL NEWS
I could talk about Kobe or Laci Peterson or some other media generated idiocy, but the California Recall is the most important idiocy around right now and bears repeated examination.
What we're looking at right now is a two man race for the secondary maybe vote. I call is the secondary maybe vote because it really doesn't count for much if the primary vote swings no (and boy is it swinging...). For once I really agree with Gray Davis. This vote isn't about whether or not he's doing a good job. He's not the world's best governor, but there have been far worse who stayed in office a lot longer and some who even became president after being worse. This vote is about Republican shenanigans. They are playing Californians for rubes by making us somehow think a new governor's going to solve all of our problems. All it really does is give them the ability to disrupt a state they don't really care about (see Bill Simon's candidacy...). Shortsanddockers can't clean up our budget without raising taxes. It's just not going to happen. But what the Repubs will do is cut school money and health care money and, if they can, prison money because better not to pay taxes than have any kind of quality of life or school for those people less fortunate than Starwarshater (alright, maybe a bit severe, but our school budget sucks right now and a modest tax increase could solve quite a few problems. I'm not anti-taxation. I used to be. But we pay less than most people in the history of people and if we paid jut a bit more and stopped spending money on waras and rebuilding countries we've destroyed in wars, maybe our country would be just a little better...just a little is all I'm asking for).
So this is a two man secondary maybe vote (Be sure to vote no on the primary real vote...just do it. DO IT!) between Bustamente and Swansongsinger. All I'll say is this: vote for the guy who can read the speech written for him.
(And Arianna, please drop out...you run the risk of being labeled a hypocrite)
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I could talk about Kobe or Laci Peterson or some other media generated idiocy, but the California Recall is the most important idiocy around right now and bears repeated examination.
What we're looking at right now is a two man race for the secondary maybe vote. I call is the secondary maybe vote because it really doesn't count for much if the primary vote swings no (and boy is it swinging...). For once I really agree with Gray Davis. This vote isn't about whether or not he's doing a good job. He's not the world's best governor, but there have been far worse who stayed in office a lot longer and some who even became president after being worse. This vote is about Republican shenanigans. They are playing Californians for rubes by making us somehow think a new governor's going to solve all of our problems. All it really does is give them the ability to disrupt a state they don't really care about (see Bill Simon's candidacy...). Shortsanddockers can't clean up our budget without raising taxes. It's just not going to happen. But what the Repubs will do is cut school money and health care money and, if they can, prison money because better not to pay taxes than have any kind of quality of life or school for those people less fortunate than Starwarshater (alright, maybe a bit severe, but our school budget sucks right now and a modest tax increase could solve quite a few problems. I'm not anti-taxation. I used to be. But we pay less than most people in the history of people and if we paid jut a bit more and stopped spending money on waras and rebuilding countries we've destroyed in wars, maybe our country would be just a little better...just a little is all I'm asking for).
So this is a two man secondary maybe vote (Be sure to vote no on the primary real vote...just do it. DO IT!) between Bustamente and Swansongsinger. All I'll say is this: vote for the guy who can read the speech written for him.
(And Arianna, please drop out...you run the risk of being labeled a hypocrite)
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Thursday, August 14, 2003
MORE RUSH IDIOCY
Sorry to be harping on Rushie now, but his fat ass is such an easy target (what with all the dangling polyps that kept him from Vietnam...)
But check this out. Rushie seems to think one's ability to order and eat a sandwich is completely relative to one's ability to appreciate the plight of the common man. Didn't Rushie criticize Clinton for his ability to eat as the common man did? What a stupid waste of time. Can't the porcine pontificator think of something better to criticize Kerry for than his culinary blunders?
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Sorry to be harping on Rushie now, but his fat ass is such an easy target (what with all the dangling polyps that kept him from Vietnam...)
But check this out. Rushie seems to think one's ability to order and eat a sandwich is completely relative to one's ability to appreciate the plight of the common man. Didn't Rushie criticize Clinton for his ability to eat as the common man did? What a stupid waste of time. Can't the porcine pontificator think of something better to criticize Kerry for than his culinary blunders?
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Sunday, August 10, 2003
RUSH'S MEMORY LAPSE
This just in from Rush "my ass polyp made me miss Vietnam" Limbaugh regarding Svartzenogger's campaign:
"He's putting everything off here, later responding to Lauer's request for "specifics" with the phrases "leadership" and "You have to be a uniter, not a divider." That's the kind of stuff you hear from the left while they're dividing people. "
No, Rushie. That's the kind of stuff we heard from Bushco in the 2000 election. Don't you remember? He was going to "change the tone" and all that. As a matter of fact, the "uniter" line was his, not someone on the left. Swertzinuggor is just using a Bush line, which, in a fairly liberal state like California, is not such a good idea. It makes us think of Bushco. But maybe that's what you want, isn't it Rushie? You want us to think of Bushco when we think of Nakedasser and not think to vote for him.
Don't worry about it. We're going to keep the governor we elected the first time around.
VOTE "NO" ON THE RECALL...Reject the divisive dirty Republican Fuckery.
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This just in from Rush "my ass polyp made me miss Vietnam" Limbaugh regarding Svartzenogger's campaign:
"He's putting everything off here, later responding to Lauer's request for "specifics" with the phrases "leadership" and "You have to be a uniter, not a divider." That's the kind of stuff you hear from the left while they're dividing people. "
No, Rushie. That's the kind of stuff we heard from Bushco in the 2000 election. Don't you remember? He was going to "change the tone" and all that. As a matter of fact, the "uniter" line was his, not someone on the left. Swertzinuggor is just using a Bush line, which, in a fairly liberal state like California, is not such a good idea. It makes us think of Bushco. But maybe that's what you want, isn't it Rushie? You want us to think of Bushco when we think of Nakedasser and not think to vote for him.
Don't worry about it. We're going to keep the governor we elected the first time around.
VOTE "NO" ON THE RECALL...Reject the divisive dirty Republican Fuckery.
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Thursday, August 07, 2003
RECALL FEVER...CATCH IT
Ok, Harpo...
So while everyone's talking about Arnold's run, they are focusing on the wrong Arnold. Of course, people seem to take Danny Devito's twin brother seriously. After all, he's married to a Kennedy(or an Alien doppleganger of a Kennedy...look at her! She's a frickin alien. She eats rats with some kind of weird reptilian jaw apparatus. She ain't human. No way! No how!). He's also made some great action flicks with pithy one liners that other people wrote for him. He's also built his body up to gargantuan proportions. All of these things are, of course, worthwhile attributes for the governor of the fifth largest economy in the world. (if career politicians like Gray Davis can't fix it, try a career actor).
But we are focusing on the wrong Arnold who's running for governor. For all of the Terminator's great one liners, do any top, "Whatchoo talkin about, Willis?" I don't think so. I can't think of one great line Schwartzennegger (the fuck if I can spell his name at will...no, I don't feel like looking it up) has that can top Gary Coleman's personal catch phrase. And why not Gary Coleman? What does Schwartzy have that Gary doesn't (besides an active career)? Gary's cuter, easier to mock (trust me) and can always be counted on for a good laugh like when the budget is brought to his desk, he can say "Whatchoo talkin about, congress?" Plus, we need an African American governor. Does anyone else have one? I don't think so. Sure we'd rather have Denzel or Samuel Jackson, but if all we have is Gary Coleman as our black actor/gubernatorial candidate, then we must take him as seriously as some Austrian bodybuilder/line repeater (calling him an actor is a bit of an insult to actors). It's either him or Angelyne or Larry Flynt, really.
The real problem will be finding the candidate you want to vote for on the ballot. There's going to be around a thousand candidates. If my name were Aaron A. Aaronson, I would run just to be first in line. Some people will vote that way...like picking a plumber (which, of course, California really needs to unclog all the shitheads in Sacramento).
Vote no on the recall and then, if you have to, pick Cruz Bustamente. He's doing the right thing by putting his name on the ballot. We need one real person to vote for among all the frickin fakery.
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Ok, Harpo...
So while everyone's talking about Arnold's run, they are focusing on the wrong Arnold. Of course, people seem to take Danny Devito's twin brother seriously. After all, he's married to a Kennedy(or an Alien doppleganger of a Kennedy...look at her! She's a frickin alien. She eats rats with some kind of weird reptilian jaw apparatus. She ain't human. No way! No how!). He's also made some great action flicks with pithy one liners that other people wrote for him. He's also built his body up to gargantuan proportions. All of these things are, of course, worthwhile attributes for the governor of the fifth largest economy in the world. (if career politicians like Gray Davis can't fix it, try a career actor).
But we are focusing on the wrong Arnold who's running for governor. For all of the Terminator's great one liners, do any top, "Whatchoo talkin about, Willis?" I don't think so. I can't think of one great line Schwartzennegger (the fuck if I can spell his name at will...no, I don't feel like looking it up) has that can top Gary Coleman's personal catch phrase. And why not Gary Coleman? What does Schwartzy have that Gary doesn't (besides an active career)? Gary's cuter, easier to mock (trust me) and can always be counted on for a good laugh like when the budget is brought to his desk, he can say "Whatchoo talkin about, congress?" Plus, we need an African American governor. Does anyone else have one? I don't think so. Sure we'd rather have Denzel or Samuel Jackson, but if all we have is Gary Coleman as our black actor/gubernatorial candidate, then we must take him as seriously as some Austrian bodybuilder/line repeater (calling him an actor is a bit of an insult to actors). It's either him or Angelyne or Larry Flynt, really.
The real problem will be finding the candidate you want to vote for on the ballot. There's going to be around a thousand candidates. If my name were Aaron A. Aaronson, I would run just to be first in line. Some people will vote that way...like picking a plumber (which, of course, California really needs to unclog all the shitheads in Sacramento).
Vote no on the recall and then, if you have to, pick Cruz Bustamente. He's doing the right thing by putting his name on the ballot. We need one real person to vote for among all the frickin fakery.
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Friday, August 01, 2003
THE WEEK IN REARVIEW
My favorite story of the week was how ex-Admiral John Poindexter (R - Pardoned) was forced to retire do to the fantabulous idea of creating a futures market for terrorism. I'd like to buy long on activity in Belfast and Israel, please. I think I'll short Bratslavia. Genius. And the poor guy was chastised for it. Lost his job because of it. A damned shame, really. Ideas like this are so amazingly out there that they deserve our praise, not our scorn. Shame on Bushco for not following through with this brilliant plan. They just don't have the vision to see the possiblities of allowing people to profit from terrorism. If it's going to happen, somebody should make a buck, right? (oh, wait...Halliburton's made some cash from the whole affair which means Dick Cheney made some cash and I'm sure Bushco did as well...but why can't I profit from it? Why can't you? It's not fair, I tells ya)
The rest of my week was spent either studying for my Spanish final or working on my final comparative literature paper. Those being done, I can now relax for two days before starting my next classes (more Spanish and literature).
Last night, however, I took a break from the school pressure to attend the Hollywood Bowl with my wife and parents. We saw world famous soprano, Sumi Jo, perform with the L.A. Philharmonic and she was amazing (the Phil was in top form as well). One of the few really great nights I can count with my wife and parents (the only other one, really, was our wedding). We also came within touching distance of Stevie Wonder, who is a big man with a little girlfriend who favors kimonos...that's all I have to say about that.
I'm going to enjoy my next two days off. I'll write a little here, read Heart of Darkness for the upcoming class and, otherwise, rest, eat and do some yoga.
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My favorite story of the week was how ex-Admiral John Poindexter (R - Pardoned) was forced to retire do to the fantabulous idea of creating a futures market for terrorism. I'd like to buy long on activity in Belfast and Israel, please. I think I'll short Bratslavia. Genius. And the poor guy was chastised for it. Lost his job because of it. A damned shame, really. Ideas like this are so amazingly out there that they deserve our praise, not our scorn. Shame on Bushco for not following through with this brilliant plan. They just don't have the vision to see the possiblities of allowing people to profit from terrorism. If it's going to happen, somebody should make a buck, right? (oh, wait...Halliburton's made some cash from the whole affair which means Dick Cheney made some cash and I'm sure Bushco did as well...but why can't I profit from it? Why can't you? It's not fair, I tells ya)
The rest of my week was spent either studying for my Spanish final or working on my final comparative literature paper. Those being done, I can now relax for two days before starting my next classes (more Spanish and literature).
Last night, however, I took a break from the school pressure to attend the Hollywood Bowl with my wife and parents. We saw world famous soprano, Sumi Jo, perform with the L.A. Philharmonic and she was amazing (the Phil was in top form as well). One of the few really great nights I can count with my wife and parents (the only other one, really, was our wedding). We also came within touching distance of Stevie Wonder, who is a big man with a little girlfriend who favors kimonos...that's all I have to say about that.
I'm going to enjoy my next two days off. I'll write a little here, read Heart of Darkness for the upcoming class and, otherwise, rest, eat and do some yoga.
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